The risk of love is loss, and the price of loss is grief.
                                                            But the pain of grief
                                                              Is only a shadow
                                                     When compared with the pain
                                                           Of never risking love. 
                                                                                                            --  Hilary Stanton Zunin



                                       



Boy.  Just when we're doing awesomely, in drops a rabid-squirrel douchebag to indicate otherwise.  Or at least attempt to...



                       


I'm gonna go ahead and address the bad before I get to the good, today. 


                                                

I'm not sure why some of us are behaving like psychotic,  uncontrollable ex-girlfriends on a ridiculous amount of crack, but we need to stop.  I mean that.  That behavior needs to stop.  I am not saying it for my own good, but for the sake of some of you who have it good on paper-- companion, car, career, house, the whole nine yards-- and yet continue to chase what and who isn't yours. 



                 


Hang-up calls conducted on Valentine's day or on any other special occasions are creepy.  Not cute.  Not funny.  Not suspicious.  Creepy.  Both terms withhold different, special meanings, in fact:

                       Suspicious:  Gee, who could be calling?

                       Creepy:  Do I need a restraining order here or what, asshole?

Understand that when it comes to the Sick Person card that it is becoming apparent to those around some of us that something is off-balance upstairs, in that space between our ears, due to some imagined feeling of loss (5 of Cups).  Imagined, because the loss is actually disillusionment.  As such, we won't be escaping questions, advice, a lecture, treatment, therapy, a hospital stay or even a good dosage of our own medicine.  Because what happens with off-balanced minds is that they "slip" and cause not just themselves but others to fall.  And it just may be that that fall will be nipped in the bud, this week. 

Don't lose your minds.  Be grateful for what you already have in your possession because all is not lost.

This is a particularly good week for some to set their heads straight.  You know who you are.  Cease playing manipulative games with others because a certain gig was up long, long ago.  Let's discuss our problems, openly, or forget them. 

What appears as a hee-hee joke to some is illegal in the eyes of others.  Don't turn immature behaviors into something you'd never imagined happening to you.  As an example, some might be forced to rehabilitate or reach a compromise in some way instead of having the choice to do so.  Others may be forced to resign a position of power and status.  And still others may find that they've lost at a long-time battle of wills/egos for control.

Got it?

Chances are that some will be paying a very high price for meddling in affairs that are not their own.  Those who wish to stir up some kind of ruckus or confusion elsewhere are included in this bill, of course.  But listen up, do-gooders, 'cause you're definitely not left out of the equation.  Ensure that what you are working for, what you are researching, what you are bringing back to health, what you are clearing or cleaning, what you are striving to change or fix is worth all of you.  I say that because some will be at risk of exhaustion, awkwardness, discomfort, disease, agony and/or loss that could have been prevented if we'd never gotten involved in the first place... or if we'd just had a moment to mull things over before jumping head-first into murky waters or nasty emotions or a tedious task.

What are we looking for, anyway? 

Whaddaya want?

How about we tell others what we want instead of assuming that they know what we want?

How about we really, truly want something so that we'll succeed at it?

We can't be self-absorbed jerks when it comes to wanting certain people to remain in our lives.

Duh.

I figured to issue these warnings because it's catching on that some of us are low-life pieces of sh*t, and we're beginning to stink real bad to others.  We're exhausting others.  The patience of others is running out.  Some of us out here have been stuck on some drug-like illusion that has brought about more harm than good to others and they will fight back in a deep way. 

                            

Well, if we don't want a taste of our own medicine, I strongly suggest we move on.  I won't be the only one telling some of you to let whatever it is that you think still exists go, and move on while you haven't lost much.  Only three "cups" have spilled over its contents.  You have two left that you can make the best with.  Some may have had some "luck" contaminating others with negativity, but these folks won't have the glory of contaminating everyone.  Not everyone is as stupid as some would like to believe, or as soft for that matter, and they won't be allowing anyone to discourage, distract or derail them. 

Sometimes all that negativity we become contaminated with turns into an infection that's easily cleared up with enough rest and care. 

Other times, it's not that easy to get rid of.  And so, we owe it to ourselves not to allow any relationships or people to "infect" us.


                                      


Food poisoning, poisonings, poisoned hearts and minds, contaminated items and necessities and souls...  Sigh.  Let's be careful.  Let's be smart.  Let's be wise.

Unfulfilled expectations?  Disappointed?  Big sh*t!  Get in line. 


                          


I f*cked up.  That's a very useful mantra that'll get some of us started on the road to recovery.  And an honest one at that.  There is one character in the Five of Cups card, and a single pose of shame, indicating that only one person is responsible for the spilled contents (disappointments).  Guess who that is.

No one's taken anything away from us.  The cups are lying or standing upright on the ground.  If someone else were responsible for our losses or "losses", if someone else stole our stuff, neither the contents nor the cups would still be there.

On the bright side, we still have what it takes to rise again, to dust ourselves (even others) off.  Again, all is not lost.  Thing is, only we  can dust yourselves off, this time.  No one is going to do that for us.  We're on your own.

Don't be afraid of coming to terms with reality with a big I f*cked up.  Admittance of f*ck-ups initiates the rectification of error.

I f*cked up.  It's not that hard.


For some, last week was a rough one.  For others, only a part of that week was rough. 

Regardless, let's rest assured that we will kick-off a healing process, discouragement and doubt a thing of the past, this week, through the Sick Person card.  The only catch is that we're going to have to follow the advice or "prescription" of someone we look up to or respect.  This person knows more about what is going on in our heads, in our hearts, in our souls, in our bodies, etc, since he/she has been witnessing changes around us that we've overlooked.  It is always helpful to obtain an opinion from someone outside of our situations, anyhow.


                                                          



 WANTED: Objectivity

There is nothing wrong with crying, feeling cranky or tired or defeated or anxious around what we're bidding farewell to or letting go of, this week, according to the Five of Cups.  What matters is whether we grow from this experience or dwell on it.  I can suggest that we aim to grow from it because dwelling gets us nowhere.  It's one thing if we need a little extra time to adapt to changes.  But that's not the same as using our suffering or "suffering" as an excuse to keep from doing anything else, such as communicating and being productive. 
  
Speaking of communication, let's try not to send mixed signals in any capacity, this week.  Let's be direct and clear in our conversations and messages. 


                          

No one wants to play Cat-and-Mouse. 

No one wants to be toyed with. 

And, by the way, when we give something, we shouldn't ask for it back.  There is a difference between a gift and a loan.  If we're loaning something, we need to express that we are loaning said item and that we'll need it back by such date. 

Stop f*cking around, folks.  Stop trying to inflict guilt upon others.  You're not that special.  Not worth the hassle and stress, either.  At least not anymore.

Also, let's understand that there is such a thing as self-inflicted guilt, not just guilt imposed upon us by others.  This is a great week to figure out which is which, to forget about guilt caused upon us by others, and to forgive ourselves of whatever it is we think we're guilty of.  We can't move on unless we can forgive our own indiscretions.  Once we forgive ourselves, we'll find it easier to tell others to f*ck off with their games.

Follow instructions.  And be patient about results.

For those of us who had great time last week, this week will be even better.  We'll be feeling better.  We'll look better.  We'll be open to the opinions and assistance of others (about time for some of you).  We may feel healthy and renewed enough to break the ice reestablish or create lines of communication. 

Or, we may finally achieve some rest and relaxation, all of which is necessary to recovery!

We'll have to create or reestablish some lines of communication.  Not all, and not many.  Some.  I say that because we might be hearing from (or about) someone who is ailing, and we may not be sure of where this individual's health will be going.  The only way to certainty is through communication, and for some of us that may mean waving a white flag.

Alternatively, we may fall ill or injured or awfully stressed or depressed, requiring the support of one we haven't kept in touch with. 

By no means am I here to disnify reality and announce that we'll for sure be back in touch with Mr. or Ms. Wonderful.  Especially not if we've repeatedly behaved like a-holes.  Let's face it-- some of us haven't been the most easy-going, caring characters and we fully deserve to be shunned at this point by those who have tried to reach out to us, tried to reach a compromise, only to be met with me-me-me.

Those of us who hate being misunderstood need to stop playing manipulative games.  How can we expect to be understood when it's obvious that we're screwing around and don't want really, truly want to be understood? 

Saying something and meaning the opposite doesn't fly.  If we want to be understood, we need to humble ourselves and speak coherently and sincerely.


        


If we're going to be contagious, let's infect others with our smiles.  Sincerity and joy in our work will not go unnoticed, so let's not be afraid to pour our hearts into what we do.  Let's just keep from being overly generous, that's all.

We're going to be fine.

Have a super week!